The story is about a soldier  who is in the middle of an attack on the border and deals with the hardships of war while he goes through a lot of emotions.

 

It was all white. Nothing but the white shining snow as far as one could see. I don’t remember the last time I had seen sunlight. My body was giving up. Every tissue in my body had dried up and so had the rum bottle in my uniform’s pocket. The chilling wind was striking my face like a hundred sharp knives all thrown at me at once. Walking through three feet deep snow had made my feet numb and I could hardly understand how I was still able to move. The bullet wound on my arm had continued to pour out blood making a trail on the white snow as I moved further. I had lost all sense of direction and was not sure whether I was going on the right way or not. My body could no longer bear the pain and with each passing breath, I felt I was closing in to my end. A train of thoughts started to cross my mind.

I spoke to myself, “I can’t die like this. I had joined the army to protect my country from enemies and I still have bullets in my gun and blood in my body. I can’t yield to death when my own people are in trouble. I have to continue, I have to survive this.”

I started moving more resolutely. My whole body had developed cuts from the cold wind. I could hardly feel any part of my body now. Suddenly, my right foot got stuck in the thick snow and I fell down right on my face. I shouted in pain but no sound came out. I tried to press my hands against the snow in order to get up but all futile. My palms had all torn up and my hands had become too weak to take my body weight. I stayed in that position for quite a long time. Then, with some effort, I managed to turn around and lay on my back. It had become impossible for me to get up. My whole life flashed in front of my eyes like a movie. Life had not always been this tough. I had definitely seen some colourful and much warmer days in my life. I started thinking of those days.

“Kavita! What is taking you so long in there? I am starving!” I shouted.

“Coming in a minute Virat! Have some patience” my wife replied.

“Have some patience!” repeated my 3 and a half year old daughter in a funny tone sitting comfortably on my lap. She had been catching up words really quick, so we always had to be careful with our words when she would be around.

“Ok my darling!” I said kissing her head.

“Where is mom?” I enquired as my wife served food.

“She is praying in the next room. I will call her” Kavita replied.

My whole life was devoted to these three women in my life. My father had passed away early, so I learned to take responsibility really fast. I knew how important I was in the lives of my mother , wife and my daughter. My mother was a very strong woman both emotionally and physically. She could have easily broken up on seeing the corpse of her husband being brought to her covered in the tricolor. She always knew how uncertain the life of a soldier is but she always realized the fact that it is the most important job that any individual can take up. She knew that if it wasn’t for the army men, we would not have been able to enjoy the freedom that we do today. Therefore, respect for the army never went down in her eyes even when it took her husband away from her. She always preached that my father was a courageous and brave man who gave away his life fighting for his country. She always took pride in telling people that despite all that has happened to her she still wants her son to join the army; and so did I. I did not join the army because of some external pressure from any one. I joined the army because I remember how people used to treat my father with respect. They would look at him with dignity and sometimes even strangers used to shake his hand and thank him for what he does for the country. I wanted that! I always craved for such respect and acceptance of the people around me. Monetary benefits never mattered to me that much, but the sense of pride my father felt when he wore his army uniform attracted me the most. So I decided to follow my father’s path. Some relatives and neighbours thought my mother was a “mad woman” to let her son go through the same pain and trauma that her husband went through. However petty things tend to fade away when you try to focus on your main goal and that’s what eventually happened with me.

Two years after I had joined the army, one day when I was home for Diwali, my mom told me that she had found a girl perfect for me and said that she had even talked to her family about it. I didn’t want any form of relationship at that time, so I refused her bluntly. But my mother, being the stubborn woman that she was, paid no heed whatsoever to whatever I had to say on this matter. The very next day I saw a large group of people seated in my drawing room and it took me no time to understand what was happening. I was made to meet the girl who was infact really beautiful. We chatted for a little while and I actually happened to like her. However I was almost certain that she would not want to settle in with a man who wasn’t even half as good looking as she was. But to my surprise, she was indeed impressed by me and gave her agreement to our alliance. Kavita’s father was a retired colonel so she and I had a lot in common. Eventually we got married but Kavita found it really difficult to manage the household chores and to make my daughter understand why her father does not come back from work every evening like other people and why sometimes he has to leave suddenly. A similar incident happened this day. After my mother finished her prayers, we had lunch. My daughter totally thrilled to see her daddy home after a long time. However at that very moment the phone rang…

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