They say that every scar has a story behind it but what if those scars are the memories of someone.
“I am proud of my scars” She smilingly traced her fingers over her wounds. She continued, “They tell me who I was and who I have become and a constant reminder of mistakes of past”
Closing the file, the therapist said, “So, I guess it is our last session”
Getting on their feet, both shook hands. She took her bag and walked out of the door. As she pressed the elevator button, her phone ringed. She answered, “Hey Emily…yes…I’ll be there…No, I would not miss it…yes…okay see you in an hour”
Blood dripping down the sink, she had tears racing down her cheeks. Wounds on soul hurt more wounds on body. She wiped the tears when she heard the knock on her door. When she peeked outside, she was relieved to see her big sister. She stepped out saying, “I need to be alone. Leave me alone”
Hurriedly, she grabbed her wrist asking, “So you could do whatever you were doing?”
“Daisy, leave me alone. I fine”
“Mia, you know you can talk to me whenever you want”
Daisy made her sit on bed. Mia shrugged her hands off saying, “Why can’t they understand that I can never be like you. You and I are different. I would never be topper”
Daisy adjusted her hair and wiping off her tears, she held her hand, “I know. I am sure they will understand with time. You don’t have to do these things to get their attention”
“Well, apparently I am getting attention for wrong, why not this be one of them” Mia spoke showing off her newly made cut. She continued, “This at least shows that I have control over something. That I am human, not a robot who would do whatever they want me to do”
Daisy rushed to get the first-aid box and started wrapping bandage around Mia’s wrist. Mia observed her loving sister carefully nurse the wound which she had been doing since Mia started self-harm.
She settled in her chair. It was the day of her book launch. Reporters started asking questions about the book. One of the reporter asked, “You told us that it is about a girl trapped in a place, a web kind of. Is it inspired by your own life or someone else?”
A small smile came on her lips saying, “I am a writer. Sometimes, the story would have some relevance with me or you but that doesn’t mean it is inspired by everyone. At one point, you will think that it is inspired by your life too because we all are leading similar lives. We are trapped in a web called life and are trying to find our way out. So, I would say it is inspired by everyone”
Turning around, she asked, “Next question?”
“Next question?” Daisy asked. Mia glanced at her sister, “No way, you could have finished that. It was a really tough one”
Daisy shrugged with a smile, “Sissy, you know I am good at math”
Mia handed her the book saying, “Okay, so finish up my homework then”
Daisy shook her head, “No way. I am not doing that”
Mia pouted, “Please”
Daisy said, “I am not going to do that. You are going to do your homework. I am going to give you answers if you need any”
She gave the book back to Mia and went on back to working on her laptop. Mia asked, “D, you are going to tutor me this time, right?”
Daisy gave a big smile, “Yes, I know this test is important for you”
“It is important” Emily said handing her the papers. It was contract with some company. She read the papers and signed them. Sitting back in her chair, she looked at the photo on her desk. Two sisters smiling together.
“You are dead to me” their dad shouted scolding the 19-year Mia. Mia who never dared to look up was staring him right in eyes.
She repeated again, “I am not going to do this. I don’t care what you want me to do but I am not choosing what your dreams are. I am going to follow my dreams. I am going to sing.”
“And you think that…this crazy thing will get you money? You would be happy and settled if you choose to go to this college” their dad said in high voice. Daisy was watching their argument with their mother as usual. Mia said screaming at top of her voice, “All my life I had done what you want me to do. I can’t be like Daisy and lead a simple life. I want adventure and fun. I know I am an adult. So, shouldn’t I have a right to choose my career?”
He shook his head, “You failed me. I should have known you would be a humiliation to the family.”
Mia snapped, “I knew you never loved me. I was always a burden for you unlike your favourite daughter. But unlike you, she understands me and supports me”
“Fine, if she says I’ll let you go to this competition” he said. They both turned to Daisy who was standing with her arms crossed. She started rubbing her arms and looked at Mia saying, “Mia, I think dad is right. You should look for a settled career”
Mia was shocked. Their dad said, “So, the decision is made. Mia is going to the college to study business”
Mia ran in her room with Daisy following her. As Daisy entered the room, Mia asked sobbing, “Why? For once in life, I wanted to stand for me against dad and you supported him. I trusted you, D.”
Daisy replied, “I thought it would be best for you”
Mia shouted, “Get out right now”
At night, when Daisy went to call Mia for dinner, she found a letter on her bed which read:
I would rather die than sit at desk. I trusted you D but you didn’t trust me.
Hurriedly, she opened the door of washroom and found her little sister on floor covered in blood.
Two people died that day. A sister who just wanted to get out and another who did a mistake by not trusting her. Self-harm was one of the gifts that she left for her older sister driven by guilt.
“I’ll always love you M” she said looking at the photo and seeing those bright eyes filled with happiness.