So what if a girl says she’s different? Actually, when you see clearly that no girl is different when it comes to love, they all go through the same emotions when it comes to love. Let’s go back to 2001 when my parents divorced and I went with my mother to my Nona’s house. I had no idea what was going on around me. I used to see my mother cry, but I didn’t know what was happening, me too. little to remember the presence of my father in my life, so Nona’s place was in a neighborhood full of people but it was quiet, they had a garden where I used to spend all the time after I came back from school, I started school soon after to move into his place with mom. My mom was a working woman, with a well paying job so money wasn’t really an issue, so one day I was sitting in a garden playing with my dog when suddenly a boy about my age came to my side, he had chocolate eyes. and he started blabbering about his clay toys. It was the start of something new for me, those chocolate brown eyes and the lil boy became my best friend for years to come.
Like all the other stories, time also passed in this story. We became friends, family friends, our families used to plan trips together and we made good memories, everything was going well, but like all good things, this too ended. Our families had a big fight and we got sidetracked because of their differences, we weren’t allowed to hang out together and sadly we didn’t share the same school, it was the year 2005 and I was riding my bike when there was a knock on the door. he put me down from behind and guess who it was, it was the same chocolate eyed guy, i fell off my bike and he went off on his bike and he didn’t even help me up. That my last memory of him.
My mother remarried in the year 2006 and I was sent to a hostel or you can call it a boarding school in the outskirts of the city. because my parents were in the government. services and they transferred frequently, they didn’t want their work to affect my studies, but the good thing was that my boarding school was close to Nona’s house and I loved my grandparents very much, so I visited them on weekends, sometimes mom and dad used to come. at Nona’s on the weekends, so we hung out as a family. I wasn’t very attached to my new father, but he was a good man, so I stayed decent to him.
Everything was fine, Hostel-Studios-Casa de Nona-Weekends.
I never saw him, chocolate eyed boy, even when I visited him on the weekends, I didn’t see him. I don’t know why, but it must have been fate, living next to each other without seeing each other.
In 2008 I found out that I was going to be a sister, shortly after I had a little brother, so I was taking my last exam and my father came to take me to the hospital from the school hostel to see my little brother, it was a pure blessing those little fingers, I have a brother.
In order to give us a good life and stay as a real family, my parents decided to stay in a quiet city and I moved from a hostel to a city and also away from Nona’s house. There I lost the opportunity to see it, but God knew that Facebook and Instagram were going to be a trend in the coming years.
We were a happy family, I was transferred to a convent school, I finally socialized and made a group of lifelong friends. It was La La Land for me.
In 2014 I made a Facebook account and in a few days I received a request from Fahad Siddiqui, yes that was his name, his real name. His name brought back memories in a sequence: Leaving-Arriving at Nona’s house-Dog-Fahad-Friendship-Rainy nights-Terrace-Fights-Marriage-Hostel-Hermanito-Moving and then Fahad again.
I didn’t accept the request from him because he was still mad about our last memory so I got a text from him saying are you the same girl I used to be friends with? ‘Aliza’?
I said yes! I asked him if he really remembered me and then he started telling me things that I didn’t even remember doing together. He said that I was his first best friend and you know the exercise that we started to remember the day and night. Our keyboard never stopped typing. We were inseparable once again, I always saw him as a friend and never felt any weird vibes between us.
I should probably tell you now that I never had a father-daughter connection with my New Father. We never talked for more than a few minutes, it was like that and it was fine, so psychology says that if a girl does not have a good relationship with her father, it is not easy for her to approach any boy or trust him.
I had a problem trusting the guys I always had. Fahad and I started talking on the calls and we were like long lost best friends and I also helped him locate the girls he liked at Nona’s house whenever he visited there. Our family rivalry wasn’t much now, so everyone was decent to each other.
In 2016 I met Fahad for the first time in person in a different city where he was visiting my cousin and he, his sisters. We plan to meet and greet in person and up close. So there was our first meeting, me being me and him looking at me with completely different emotions in his eyes, I could see him fall but I didn’t want that, I never did. I didn’t want to trust him in that field. I wanted to stay friends with him, but some things are inevitable and you can’t control them, he fell in love with me and I didn’t or I just kept repeating it to myself.
People have touched me as a child differently, I was little but the touch was disgusting even at that tender age that I knew because there was no superman aka father to save me from the villains.
He despised men and suddenly this guy made me despise them a little less, this chocolate eyed boy cracked my shell and drowned me in water. I could see me fall, but I didn’t want God to know my misery!
He fell in love with me, I felt sorry for him and he pampered me, he cared, he protected me.
Disorder! I was a mess and he decided to deal with this mess. He knew how dysfunctional he was, but he chose to be with me. Things were la la land once again, but you know how they say that behind a mask is a real face, so he always comes back to haunt you. Fahad loved me in my imperfections, but he never tried to get what he was facing, he wanted a girlfriend, he didn’t want Madiha or the past he had made me. I was pretty strong, never let anyone in. I let him in and he’s still here, but the river is all dry, the flowers are all withered, the leaves are coming off the branches, and the waterfall is near.