So you know all those times when there is a lot of noise all around you but you just cannot seem to focus on it. You try really hard but you just get sucker punched in the gut because apparently all you have been doing is pretending. To the world. To every other person that matters. But most importantly to yourself. And sometimes you just get so overwhelmed when you stop for a moment and realize that you have turned into a very phony version of yourself.

Nothing seems to make sense anymore like this entire post doesn’t while I’m typing it. Even this seems extremely bogus. But I have to at least try before I come to any conclusion. Maybe it really will help me unburden so let’s do this.

First off, always and I repeat ALWAYS put yourself first. Now, not because you are a self-centered sadist. But because you are in love with yourself. It is definitely very honorable when you put someone else’s needs before yours but not at the cost of inflicting pain on yourself. That’s stupid, especially when you’re just eighteen. Even after that, really. It’s not much experience that I’m writing this post from, maybe none and I’m not sure if people will be able to relate to this entire ramble. But each person will be able to relate to at least a minute fragment of it. Now, as I was saying putting yourself first does in no way mean that you don’t care about other people. You don’t have to stomp on people’s heads. Honestly, if that’s your idea of happiness then you are one twisted soul my friend. Anyway, what I really mean is fall in love with yourself. How will you know whether you really are in love with yourself or not? Try sitting in front of the mirror(or not) and have a conversation with yourself. An honest one. Get to know yourself better. Not your favorite colour or maybe your favorite colour. Understand what makes you, you. “Do I know what my strengths are? My weaknesses? Where do I actually see myself a few years down the road? Why do I deserve something?” If this is the moment where you need to find someone who can answer these questions, you can’t even rely on yourself to answer a few questions about yourself that you wanted answers to. There might be a lot of people who will be willing to answer these questions for you right now but nothing is constant. It is the Law of Nature. Any situation in our life is not perennial. It will change. Maybe for the better, maybe for the worst. What if you don’t have someone looking out for you when you are facing a debacle?

Loving yourself does not mean that you do not appreciate every person in your life right now but you will have to live with yourself for only forever. It’s not rocket science or even as difficult as piston squats(because honestly, what kind of sorcery is that thing?). All you have to do is take yourself out on a date. Get to know yourself better. Fall in love with yourself and if you realize that you are not the kind of person you want to love than better yourself. Love yourself before you find love outside. Be at peace with who you are and if you are not, work on yourself. Be patient. Don’t be harsh on yourself. Watch movies, listen to songs, read a book, dance on your favorite songs. Have wild parties with yourself. Treat yourself with a chocolate if at the end of the day you come to the verdict that the entire day, you were happy with yourself, alone, just you and yourself, united as a force to be reckoned. That was extravagance but you never know:)

The point is, everything is momentary except you. You will have to be with yourself traversing the very difficult road that is life but no one said it would be easy, right? Don’t wait for someone so you can burden them with your problems. What if that person understands the importance of loving himself or herself? It is okay if you are broken. You can be there for yourself. It obviously doesn’t mean shutting people out but before that stop shutting yourself out. Realize your own problems, empathize with yourself for a moment and then get the hustle on to solve that problem. And trust me, even if it’s just you, it will be difficult but nothing meaningful was ever achieved easily. I’ll promise you one thing though, if you conquer yourself, it’ll be so worth your while. So what are you waiting for? Start loving yourself and everything else will fall in line.

Image source:

Everyday Feminism